Amazing Grace

This past month FB has popped up with lots of memories from last year....like today being the anniversary of my Pre-op Appointment for my Bilateral Mastectomy!

What a crazy and surreal time that was but also amazing!  I know, I know....how does someone refer to a breast cancer diagnosis and subsequent life-altering surgery as "amazing"?

Well, I'll tell you.....

#1: God is good...ALL the time. (Say it with me) And, ALL the time, God is GOOD!
Even in the worst moments, He is in control.  When we don't understand, He does. Once you relinquish control and let HIM guide, great things can happen.  God put me in all the right places at the right time.

Some of you know this, but I was not even supposed to be in San Antonio at the time of my diagnosis. If things had gone according to plan, I would have gotten married the Summer before and moved out of town.  Obviously, having my heart broken and a relationship ending was NOT something I saw as a blessing at the time!  But, in hindsight, God knew where I needed to be, who I needed to be with, and what catalyst it would take to get me there.  That relationship ending gave me the push I needed to leave my job and get back to work in the NICU that I love.  If I had not changed jobs when I did, I would have had an entirely different course of care, physicians, etc. Because of my job, I was in position to work with one of the top surgical oncologists and a renowned plastic surgery group who performed a "gold standard" type of reconstruction!  I was also surrounded by a team of people I love and who love me and supported me throughout the whole journey.  God knew....even when I didn't....amazing!

#2:  You never know how you will be used.
As a nurse, its my job to help people. I think that most nurses feel some inner calling to do just that...just part of our nature.  As a NICU nurse, I never in a million years thought I'd have anything to do with oncology...breast cancer in particular.  Because of my diagnosis, I have met so many people...other women touched by breast cancer, family members and friends.  I have friends now that I would never have met. By sharing my story openly, other women have been helped.  I've volunteered as a patient advocate with two groups and am always willing to lend an ear to another fighter/survivor.  Who would have thought I'd be

walking in breast cancer 5Ks, attending breast cancer awareness events, and blogging my personal life for the world?  My son grew a lot throughout this past year and has participated in events with me too. I believe he will have a better compassion and understanding for others in his life now. Even though this isn't the path I would have chosen, I am happy and blessed that God has allowed me to be used through it.  It is amazing is it to be able to help others!

#3: Grace is typically defined as "the free and unmerited favor of God".  My

breast cancer was caught early (Stage 0) and was contained (DCIS, non-invasive). I got my biopsy within days of the ultrasound that found it. My surgery (within 2 months later) was successful. No other locations were found and my lymph nodes were clear. Yes, I had a bilateral mastectomy, but I woke up CANCER-FREE....no chemo, no radiation.  My recovery was certainly not a breeze, but it was relatively complication free. My revision surgery gave me exactly what I needed and again was complication free.  My overall results (all completed within 1 calendar year) are wonderful. I was significantly blessed!  I know this even more than ever before in my life. I am grateful for things..little things...more than before. I  found out that I am as strong as I hoped I'd be in the face of a scary thing and happier than I imagined I would be again.  And, I surely feel HIS amazing grace in my life.

Here's hoping you feel HIS Amazing Grace in your life this week!

Friendly Reminder!

Happy Sunday!

Breast Reconstruction Graduation

A week ago today, I "graduated" from my breast reconstruction journey!  It's still hard to believe that this year of surgeries and appointments and procedures and all of the stress, pain, discomfort, and sleepless nights from those is over.  I still have my surveillance visits with my oncologist's office for a total of 5 years, but as far as reconstructive surgery...I'm done!

The appointment was quick and went well. Basically, Crystal just looked at how my tattoos had healed and asked me if I had any remaining issues that needed to be addressed. She said that everything looked great and since I'm happy with my results...that's it!  We took my final photos and that was that.  As soon as she sends me the copies, I'll post my "before and afters" for you.

Honestly, this year does not seem real sometimes. Sometimes I wake up in the morning and in that quiet moment, I think it might have all been a dream. To have been diagnosed and done all in one calendar year is truly a blessing and I am so grateful.  This year has been a learning experience. Not just medical information but a lot of learning about myself...who I am, what I can do, and how amazing my support system is.  This journey would not have been as smooth without all of my friends and family.

While last week's appointment marks the end of my reconstruction (and surgeries), it is not the end of my breast cancer journey by any means.  My incisions have healed well and my scars will eventually fade some, but I'll always carry them with me.  And, that's okay, because they mean I fought a battle and came out on the other side.

This diagnosis and subsequent journey also allowed me to meet some great women...fellow fighters and survivors.  I am honored to get to share my story here and on social media and to chat with others every day.  

So, what's next you ask?

I don't have another oncology appointment until March.  Between now and then, it's just life in my new normal.  Massaging my scars in the hopes of getting them to fade well and I need to focus on getting the extra weight I gained this year off.

And, counting my many blessings!  Watching one of my all-time favorite Christmas movies, White Christmas, as I type this post and I love this line from one of the many songs:  "If you're worried and you can't sleep, just count your blessings instead of sheep and you'll fall asleep counting your blessings!"

My last time wearing the PRMA pink gown!

I plan to continue to post along the way and keep y'all updated on healing, tips and advice, etc. 

Tip Time:
With that in mind, many of you have asked about bras and know if you've read my previous posts on the topic that bra shopping post-reconstruction can be quite challenging. Well, I found this bra from Warner's that is just about perfect!  It has extra wide sides which provide great support but don't rub on my drain scars like most bras do.  I wear it to work all day (12+ active hours) and have no issues.  It is available in both wire-free and underwire.  And, it is affordable so you could use it between surgeries (before your final size) and not spend a fortune on bras you can't wear later.  Walmart carries them for just under $18 here in San Antonio.  I've included a photo of the tag so that you can shop online if needed:

Hope all of you have a wonderful Christmas!

MY TIMELINE:

12/22/16  Routine Screening Mammogram

01/18/17  Repeat Imaging and US of left breast; LUMP found.

01/20/17  Core Needle Biopsy

01/24/17  Biopsy results positive...Stage 0 DCIS, left breast

01/25/17  Meeting with Breast Center Navigator and Genetic Testing

01/30/17  Consultation with Surgical Oncologist, Dr. K

02/08/17  Consultation with Plastic Surgeon

02/21/17  Pre-op Visit with Dr. O's nurse

02/27/17 Pre-op Labs and Testing

03/05/17 Lymph Node Injection

03/06/17 SURGERY DAY!

03/10/17 Home!

03/16/17 10 day Post-op Visit with Plastic Surgery nurse
03/20/17  2 week Post-op Appointment with Surgical Oncologist, Dr. K

04/07/17  1 month Post-Op w/Plastic Surgeon, Dr. O

04/16/17 Returning to work!
05/19/17  Appointment with Dr. O to schedule Phase 2 Surgery!

07/13/17 Pre-op Visit with Dr. O's nurse; Pre-op Labs/EKG

07/25/17 Phase 2 Surgery!!

08/08/17  2 week Post-op Visit with Plastic Surgery Nurse
09/25/17 6 month Follow-Up with Surgical Oncologist Office
11/07/17 Micropigmentation (tattoo) Day!!
12/08/17 FINAL Plastic Surgery nurse visit!  Breast Reconstruction graduation day!!

6 months Later....Surgical Oncologist Follow-up

September 06 was officially six months since my Bilateral Skin-sparing (non-nipple sparing) Mastectomy with Immediate DIEP Flap Reconstruction.  My 6 month follow-up appointment at the Surgical Oncologist's office was yesterday...at almost 7 months actually. It doesn't seem real that it has been that long ago!!  

So, here's the lowdown....

My appointment was with the Nurse Practitioner, Rebecca.  She is super sweet and a fellow breast cancer survivor.  Having personal experience with the reconstructive process and the

journey, she is an awesome resource!  

Because my cancer did not require any chemo or hormone therapy, I am not followed by a Medical Oncologist just the Surgical Oncologist.  Therefore, they will conduct all of my labs and breast exams.  Rebecca stated that I will need 6 month visits (basically a manual breast exam) for 2 years and then annual visits for 3 years....a total of 5 years surveillance. Labs will be drawn annually.  After 5 years, my annual OB/GYN breast exam will suffice.  

Big notes:  
*No mammograms ever.
*If any physician ever finds something "suspicious", I am to contact my NP immediately for an ultrasound and she will follow-up on it.

Rebecca was very complimentary of my cosmetic results.  It was nice to hear the opinion of a fellow reconstructive patient.  She said that everything looks great and that in another 6-12 months I'll be amazed at my results and how much the scars will have faded!!  Her exact quote was: "You couldn't have asked for a better cosmetic outcome!"

After my appointment, I ran some errands and made a new wreath for our front door...something special for October and Breast Cancer Awareness Month!

October Breast Cancer Awareness Wreath

Then, I got to have dinner with a bunch of old friends. We caught-up and had a lot of laughs!! Everyone needs a night out with friends once in awhile.  :)

Love these gals!

Hope y'all have a blessed week!

Sharing my Story on LIVESTRONG

My breast cancer story was shared this week on the LIVESTRONG blog and social media accounts! A little surreal to see it out there but very cool.

Here's the link:  https://blog.livestrong.org/sharing-my-breast-cancer-journey-a56f6392278

Be sure to check out their website....tons of great resources and info!

Post-op Day 17 Update

WARNING:  THERE ARE GRAPHIC POST-OP PHOTOS IN THIS POST.

Today is POD #17....

I haven't posted this week because I have been battling a little cold or allergy thing.  Let me tell you, the last thing you want is to be sneezing and coughing with surgical incisions!  It burns across each breast and my abdomen when I cough.  Thankfully, I seem to be on the upside of it today and I didn't have it nearly as bad as my poor son.

Anyway....I went to see my amazing and wonderful Surgical Oncologist, Dr. K on Monday for my 2 week post-op visit.  It was the quickest appointment ever!  He basically just told me that the final pathology came back just as it was in the OR on surgery day....perfectly clear margins and clean lymph node biopsy.  He reiterated that because I chose the bilateral mastectomy, I had no further necessary treatments, so I am good to go as a CANCER FREE patient!  As a BREAST CANCER SURVIVOR I still need to see him in 6 months, just for follow-up.

Bonus, no more mammograms....ever!  He did say that he wants me to still do breast self-exams.  Dr. K said that there can always be changes in reconstructed breasts (i.e. scar tissue, fat necrosis, etc.) and that becoming familiar with my new breasts is a good thing.  I can start doing this as soon as I am released to begin incisional massage...probably next week. (My Plastics nurse said I had to wait until all the scabs are gone to begin massage with Cocoa Butter.)

On that note, I thought I'd share some updated photos from today.....you can see the swelling has gone down significantly.  Although, I do feel more swollen by bedtime.  Dr. K commented on the "great symmetry" for after the first procedure!  They do seem pretty even.  :)

POD #17...Abdomen after
Bilateral Skin-sparing Mastectomy with DIEP Flap Reconstruction

POD #17...Breasts after
Bilateral Skin-sparing Mastectomy with DIEP Flap Reconstruction

Wearing a good bra is key!  I definitely notice if I don't have support.  I swear these gals weigh a ton!  I think its just the numbness that makes them feel that way.  It's kind of an odd feeling.  My abdomen is numb in most places too.  And, everything tingles when I ride in the car....that's really weird!

This is what I wore to my MD appointment
on Monday....felt good to wear a real bra!
The last couple of days, I've been wearing sports
bras...def. the more support, the better.

Incisions all seem to look good.  The abdomen seems to be moving along faster than the breasts.  

Abdominal incision close-up...POD #17

I'm off all meds as of Monday.  I have taken Ibuprofen a couple of nights this week; not due to true pain, but from stiffness in my back and arms from sleeping and sitting propped up all the time.  This sleeping upright on my back is getting really old!  I dream...literally...about cuddling on my side with a pillow!  

No other real excitement here.  I'm getting bored at home and it is hard to be so limited in what I am allowed and able to do.  Next week, I am looking forward to starting some arm exercises and possibly starting to drive.

Oh!  I got a call yesterday inviting me to join a team for the Komen Race for a Cure on Saturday, April 8th.  I'm not sure I'll be up to walking the whole 5K, but Survivors only have to complete part so I am definitely going to try.  My son is planning to walk with me too!  #FightLikeaGirl #TeamJules

Hope y'all are having a terrific first week of SPRING!

MY TIMELINE:

12/22/16  Routine Screening Mammogram

01/18/17  Repeat Imaging and US of left breast; LUMP found.

01/20/17  Core Needle Biopsy

01/24/17  Biopsy results positive...Stage 0 DCIS, left breast

01/25/17  Meeting with Breast Center Navigator and Genetic Testing

01/30/17  Consultation with Surgical Oncologist, Dr. K

02/08/17  Consultation with Plastic Surgeon

02/21/17  Pre-op Visit with Dr. O's nurse

02/27/17 Pre-op Labs and Testing

03/05/17 Lymph Node Injection

03/06/17 SURGERY DAY!

03/10/17 Home!

03/16/17 10 day Post-op Visit with Plastic Surgery nurse
03/20/17  2 week Post-op Appointment with Surgical Oncologist, Dr. K

T-minus 11 hours.....

The big day is tomorrow...11 hours from now I'll be checking in at 0530.

I think I'm ready...I've made my list and checked it twice..or three or four times. ;)

Still need to finish packing for the hospital but other than that I think I'm basically ready.  Every nook and cranny of the house has been cleaned...I even cleaned inside my oven this weekend.  It just felt like there was a lot to do and not enough time, but now I'm sitting here looking for things to do.

Friday was my last day at work and my amazing  coworkers threw me an awesome party!  Since my birthday is also tomorrow, it was a combination birthday/send off.  We had tons of food and they gave me such sweet, thoughtful gifts.

My coworker made this cute cake!

In our main hallway

Each card inside has a personal note written
on it from my friends!

Yesterday, we had a little family celebration.  And today, my son and I went to church and then out to lunch.  Then, I took my son by the library to pick up a few books for him to read....he will have a lot of downtime too.  After that, it was time to head out to the hospital for my lymph node injection.

I was taken to Nuclear Medicine and had to undress from the waist up.  I wore a gown open to the front and laid down on the imaging table.  The tech marked the left shoulder with a felt marker and the word "yes"!  

The radiologist then came in, did the timeout, prepped the breast and injected the dye just under the skin near the areola.  

This was NOT as bad as I had imagined or read.  It truly was a tiny needle stick.  It DOES sting quite a bit as they push the fluid in, but it is over in about a minute.  The stinging initially felt like a bad bee sting, but then more like an ant bite.  She told me it was very similar to a TB test and she was spot on!





The Nuclear Med Tech moved my table into the machine, took one image , and then I was done.

Image taken right after the injection...the dye will be taken up into my lymphatic system
overnight so that Dr. K will be able to identify the sentinel node in the morning.

Tonight, I have to drink 24 oz of a pre-op drink then nothing after midnight.  Tomorrow morning, I have to drink another 12 oz of the same drink and take a Celebrex pill before I arrive at the hospital.  It'll be a very early morning and a long day.

Mentally, I feel ready...let's just get his done.  Although, the reality of the whole lymph node biopsy is a bit scary.  That is really my biggest concern right now....coming out of this surgery and still having cancer.

I have so many wonderful friends, family, and even strangers who are praying for me right now and it is definitely felt.

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."
Romans 12:12

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation,
by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."
Philippians 4:6

I researched a lot on what to pack and what I needed to have at home.  I plan to do a post on that subject soon so that I can tell you what worked and what didn't, if I forgot anything, etc.

In the meantime, I'm going to chow down on some dinner before that NPO status kicks in!

MY TIMELINE:

12/22/16  Routine Screening Mammogram

01/18/17  Repeat Imaging and US of left breast; LUMP found.

01/20/17  Core Needle Biopsy

01/24/17  Biopsy results positive...Stage 0 DCIS, left breast

01/25/17  Meeting with Breast Center Navigator and Genetic Testing

01/30/17  Consultation with Surgical Oncologist, Dr. K

02/08/17  Consultation with Plastic Surgeon

02/21/17  Pre-op Visit with Dr. O's nurse

02/27/17 Pre-op Labs and Testing

03/05/17 Lymph Node Injection

03/06/17 SURGERY DAY!